I love you.
Yes you, I love you.
No why, no buts, I just do.
I may be crinkling my nose when I say it
I may be staring into your eyes or
I may be sniggering
But it weighs
almost more than what my shoulders can bear
Like footsteps in the sand
sinking deep but not always seen

Sometimes it's the way your eyes lit up when you laugh
Sometimes it's the bad jokes that you crack
Or the occasional serious conversations
Or just plain old bullshit-fest

Choking up with overwhelming emotions

couldn't help getting it off my chest
tightening throat
I carelessly blurt them out

Haha you love me - you said
I replied - yes unfortunately I do.
For a split second
in the silence i could hear the cogs in your head turning
So like a coward I panicked
and laughed it off

That is what I do
endless pointless banter
hiding behind a facade
laughing things off like they don't matter
but they did
they always do
Whoever you are
I always mean it when I say it
Wholeheartedly

and sometimes love it just doesn't go away

it's crazy
indeed when you're not getting the love you want, giving makes you think you will

I still remember the day I told you that three words
And you threw it back in my face